Idea Thief: the slap of a steel ruler can correct a crooked colleague claiming credit for a co-worker’s concepts. Watch Chuck “Career Fist” Smith, martial arts mastermind and motivator, as he answers a tweet from Kerry in St. Louis on besting a brainstorm burglar. Career Fist, an OFC Original Series, is the Kung Fu career advice show for white-collar warriors.
In “Zero Concept”, The Boss wants the full technical explanation. In “Our Record Loss”, Dilbert and Wally read the company press release: “The CEO stepped down after earning $100 million more than the company itself during his tenure. In a message to shareholders, he said, ‘Ha, ha. Maybe you should have bought stock in me. Who’s your daddy?’”
When it seems corporate life can’t get any more complex, along comes another password protected process, protocol or portal. It’s enough to drive one into picking passwords “Space Balls” style: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Or, you can try Matt Ryan’s method as highlighted in this ESPN spot with Matt Elliott. Scat 322 Trips Right Alert Stick Hut on 2!
Rumor has it that Ke$ha penned this little ditty in an office job prior to hitting it big on MTV. The lyrics speak for themselves: “Two pieces of paper, lost and alone. You clamped them together and gave them a home. Stapler. Stapler. Stapler.” Haunting.
Coffee, NoDoz & Red Bull: the required recipe for an office all-nighter. Many of us honed this formula in the hallowed halls of college. Years later, it can be tricky to transfer those nocturnal habits from dorm room to board room. That’s why you’ll want to study this FedEx spot and dust-off the ‘ol funnel for a flume of caffeine.
Resume: an eye gouge can help a recruiter review your resume to gauge a good fit. Watch Chuck “Career Fist” Smith, martial arts mastermind and motivator, as he answers a tweet from Barry in Kentucky on selling your strengths in a single piece of paper. Career Fist, an OFC Original Series, is the Kung Fu career advice show for white-collar warriors.
In “Better Than Being Unemployed”, the Boss offers these inspiring words to motivate Dilbert. The Boss: “How’s the old job market lately? It’s pretty bad, isn’t it? So, no matter how hard I make you work, it’s still better than being unemployed. Who’s your leader? Go, on say it!” Dilbert: “You are.” Motivation at its finest.
In this golden age of technology, it’s a wonder mankind has yet to perfect workspace climate control. In many offices, finicky thermostats appear to fluctuate between hot and cold like a company’s stock price during earnings week. That’s why we must remain ever alert for the sights and smells of sweaty pits from perspiring personnel. Just pray that dripping department-mates refrain from borrowing your stuff as seen in this ESPN spot featuring Carmelo Anthony and the sweat-tastic, Scott Van Pelt. [...]
Nothing quite earns office admiration like a perfectly executed pencil baton twirl. Unfortunately, the ability to manipulate a mechanical pen has long been deemed a natural born gift of the office supply Gods. No longer. Meet Rukario Rey, the Luke Skywalker of lead pencils. Rey’s must-see pencil spinning tutorial is practically guaranteed to get you promoted. Just avoid fist pumping triggered by his musical selection as someone will surely lose an eye.
In the “company as orchestra” analogy, you may wonder whether you’re first chair cello or fourth chair triangle. The deeper question may be whether you’re even playing for the right conductor/CEO. We suggest you cue-up this awesome spot from Monster, which poses the question with the assistance of some sweet synthesizer. Are you not entertained?!
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